September.. do you remember?
My son invited me for an afternoon snack at the Festival mall in Alabang a couple of days ago, he doesn't get off until 2pm, got there much earlier so that I could still walk around, and probably do some window shopping too, walking in the mall is one of the few forms of exercise where I could go on for hours and not feel any exhaustion, that's what my dear husband always tell me, most specially when the whole place is filled up with big banners of red bold letters in the name of "SALE," and I would just kiss him in his cheeks, we would go separate ways, he doesn't want to follow me around, you know how women likes to keep checking out for best deals, he would just sit some place where there would probably be music playing, or lots of times, I would find him watching a "blind band" playing, he would be patiently waiting for me there, I just have to make sure that I come back for him when its time to eat, he hates feeling hungry. It's simple moments like these that I miss most, since he spends most of the year working onboard, but, whenever he's on vacation? we're inseparable!
I was looking into some nice pashmina shawls, trying to feel the fabric if it was really authentic, when I see a familiar face walking right towards me, our eyes meet, almost running, screaming my name, she gave me a very tight embrace, seeing your childhood friend whom you haven't seen for like 20yrs or so is really cool!
We decided to continue our chit chat at Max's, she said she craves so much for filipino food, she's been working overseas as a nurse and is just on a 10day leave to attend to some very important family matters.
While waiting for our food, I asked her how she is and how is.. but, by then she immediately interrupted me and tells me that she and her husband are back together again. Naturally, I was shocked to hear that, I didn't know that they even separated in the first place, but I'm quite relieved to hear that at least they are together again, she then asks me how I am, and of course I told her that I'm good and that my husband and I are not together, she stopped stirring her iced tea upon hearing that, but then I told her that its only because husband is currently onboard, she laughs and tells me that I never change and that I'm still a very silly girl.
What followed that laughing moment is a sudden change of mood, she sadly narrates how just when their family's financial situations improved, her relationship with her husband turned bitter, I have some questions going through my head but did not want to interrupt her, I just listened to her instead.
She said that nothing hurts more to know that your husband to whom you have been married for twenty five years has been cheating on you. You think you know each other well, they're childhood sweethearts, and their families are friends too, never in her mind did she ever imagine that her husband would do a thing like that to her. Though she thinks she's partly to be blamed for it, (at the back of my mind I was thinking, most women whose husbands cheat, always try to blame themselves one way or the other).
I tried to lighten her up by saying, hey, don't think much about it and that there's no shame in accepting him back, you have children and they need their father. I even teased her that maybe love is rosier the second time around, and she asks me with a tearful eye.. how do you compete with someone much much younger than you lyn?, I didn't know what to say.. so I started sipping my buco pandan shake instead and I almost finished it with just one sip, that is some brain freezing moment!
A few hours passed, and its time to say goodbye, she has her errands and so do I, she gave me one big hug again, I asked her if she has facebook so that we could get in touch, she said she doesn't have one and that she's not comfortable with it anyway, she promised to write me old school snail mail way, and I told her I would love that, a few steps away and she heads back at me, and she says, one final piece of advice from a woman who's seen it all.. always remember lyn, you can relax... but, never let your guard down! and as I watch her walk away from me, I thought no one is immune.
A few moments later my son arrived and he asks me where I wanted to eat, he works now at the hotel and that he wants to treat me for a snack for a change, I can't help but feel proud that he has a job and that he's now being responsible. I told him how I accidentally met with an old friend of mine and that I am still quite full, but because I didn't want to let him down, I just opted for a blueberry cheesecake at sbarro's instead. I can't help but stare at him while he was eating, I told him about my friend's story and that how lucky we were to never have to experience those kind of heartaches as a family.
I kept thinking.. marriage is the foundation of a family, if it is weak... the whole family collapses, and that two people vowed to go through this journey forever, they should work hard to make things work, fix small problems while you still can, they can magnify any moment, even if it means saying sorry first, remember.. love, should always be stronger than pride...
"to catch a husband is an art; to hold him is a job"
Simone de Beauvoir
